Tag Team – Back Again

Check, getcha records, let’s begin.

And if you can complete the words to that phrase – you must have been a teenager in the 90’s!!! Cuz – WHOOMP – there it is.

Now that you’re all happily humming along – here’s why we’re “back again”…

Back in the familiar confines of the hospital.

we went for Kendall’s regularly scheduled check-up today with Dr. Aljadeff. Now I knew she was fighting something since she started getting that rattle at the back of her throat with a little cough on Friday nite –but it wasn’t until Sunday night, when Ben and I literally took shifts holding her upright and giving her nebu treatments, that I thought, you know, this just isn’t normal for a baby to be working this hard to breathe. So i tried to quell the panic, will her to breathe and make it through the night, and just hold on till we saw Dr. A before gettin’ all crazy-like about everything. And sure enough, as soon as Dr. A took a listen to her lungs, he immediately said he was sending her over (as in across the bridge that connects his clinic to the children’s hospital). I am SO grateful that my mom decided to come meet us for lunch today and then to go to the appointment with me. Between all the craziness of carrying a baby, the diaper bag, her feeding bag, my purse bag, her purse, the baby carrier – we looked like Lucy and Ethel just trying to get from point A to point B! It was a crazy afternoon and lots of running around – but we finally got here, got settled, got IV’s started – and you know, in this really WEIRD way, it felt like we were “home” again. Like, ok, I know this routine, I can deal with this. The nurse at the dr’s office even asked me if I knew we were going to be admitted because I was so calm about the news. After our giddiness on Friday at not being admitted, you would think I would take it even harder today –but in my heart I KNEW there was no way we could survive another night like Sunday night.

even now as I type this, after 3 doses of antibiotic, a dose of steroids, and 2 breathing treatments, her alarms keep going off. I can see her little chest rising and falling beneath the blankets. She took a 5 hour nap today after checking in. She is tired. And so I know this is the place she needs to be, for right now at least. I just pray that they will find something on some test somewhere that will tell us WHY her lungs keep getting these infections. They took a chest X-ray before we had a room here on the peds floor today, and Dr. A did come in to tell us it was a “significant bacterial pneumonia”. What that means exactly I am not sure, except something about the word significant doesn’t sound all cuddly and happy. They also swabbed her for RSV which means contact isolation again until we get the results back.  i just want her to be HEALTHY! I just want her to know that life isn’t always about getting tubes stuck in random places in your body, and that it IS possible to have a pain free day and enjoy the sunshine every now and again, and that most babies actually enjoy life and sleep in a regular bed laying down and eat with their mouths. I want her to experience all of that.

I am just sad tonite. Sad, a little relieved that at least we have a doctor who takes action, missing my babies again, trying to not think about how many days it will be this time.

And darn it I forgot to bring my cokes and candy stash to the hospital when I was packing. Sure i had EVERYTHING all ready to go on Friday – put that all away on Saturday and was caught totally by surprise tonite when I went home to pack.

oh well. The good Lord knows i really don’t NEED that twix bar I am craving.

i just really really really want it.

Sweet. i also forgot contact solution so I have to use saline IV locks to hopefully keep my contacts from drying out tonite. Ahhh the misadventures of a tired mom in the hospital.

Thanks for praying for my baby.

T